END

I'm ending this one foreal this time.

Last one. I promise. >>> www.mrsailormouth.wordpress.com

I Got My BMX Back

View Larger Map


After 2 years of separation, I have been reunited with my BMX. I took her for a healthy jaunt through the city to check out some bands. 16K. Google Maps is the Deeeeee.

Oliver Colinni

Enjoy the fruits of Dave's labour.

Short Movie I Put Together

Saw a Bum in Etobicoke

On my way over to the mailbox I saw a bum lying in the grass. I've seen a total of three bums in Etobicoke now.

Moms against everything

Things are cooking.

First of all, the Jasper Fitzhugh printed the letter I blogged in a post below.
It stirred up so much controversy that four angry mothers wrote in to rebuttal. They crucified me! But I'm going to hit them back harder. It's personal this time.

So now I got my reply all ready to go. I sent it into the editor today and hopefully it will get printed on Thursday. If it does, I think those respondent's heads are going to explode. With Jasper being so small, I assume my letter is at least sparking some conversation amongst the town residents. It's refreshing to think about.

Second and finally, I've been recruited as a writer/contributor for Toronto based, celebrity gossip web magazine, Tweeple Magazine. Check the music section for my second published article in life. Or just click HERE Hopefully this is a sign of things to come.

Picture from a recent Toronto FC game.

Danger Never Sleeps

On the morning of Saturday June 6th I woke to foreign tongue and a soar back. I was at Thom and Colin's house laying on an itchy couch. An hour later I rose to my feet and B-lined for the kitchen. Coffee. Unfamiliar with the house utensils, I filled the nearest pot with water, set it on an element and cranked that shit to high*. I paced. I drew a picture at the kitchen table. Afterwords, I proceeded out of the room and picked up a book entitled, Hangover Cures. As I flipped through the pages my attention soon rolled over to the World War 2 explosion that went off in the kitchen.
"Whoa dude, what the fuck was that?" Thom yelled from behind his bedroom door**.
To both of our surprise, the pot, which was actually some kind of camouflaged thermos, blew up the oven and the entire kitchen for that matter. We're talking glass and metal shards laced into the ceiling and walls - a real shrapnel bomb. I am pleased to announce that I wasn't watching the bubbles rise like I normally do that particular morning.


*Take note that the pot was metal and sitting on the stove. I presumed the "pot" had previously been used to boil water.

**Thom later explained that with the explosion being so loud, he thought a radiator that rest on the roof fell through the ceiling.

An End to Mono-Culture

In a simple conclusion to this blog,
Wednesday I fly home again for a more permanent stay.

Here's a letter I wrote to the local paper, which I found somewhat cheeky.

Justin Brisbane

Editor

The Fitzhugh

626 Connaught Drive

Jasper, AB

TOE 1E0

May 29, 2009

A Push in the Wrong Direction

On Thursday May 28^th Jasper’s by-law officers orchestrated an offensive against the people who matter most – our town’s bicyclists. Stern warnings and tickets were distributed along Patricia and Connaught to riders caught disobeying the rules of the road, this meaning riding in the opposite direction of traffic and/or using the sidewalk.

What a problem we have on our hands here, right? People trying to get from point A to point B via the shortest distance possible? Disrupting foot traffic and the unbearable sight of objects moving against the predetermined direction? Please! I am truly disheartened by the by-law officer’s initiative here. They are cutting down the quintessential answer to all sustainable transportation problems - biking. Moreover, they are discrediting one of the purest activities we have in this “so called national park.” In a comparison to any other form of transportation, especially in a town of this size, biking is hands-down the most efficient mode of travel.

Jasper wants to be a progressive town but this example of old-time tradition and mentality has it at a standstill (somewhere around the time of the industrial revolution when resources were not of concern.) Leave us old bicyclists alone. We aren’t endangering anyone or anything. Or perhaps we should all turn to the auto to make things easier on these officers?

- Jon Lee

Toronto (Former Jasper Resident)

Another One

Oi! I know it's been awhile but I've been quite busy soaking up the luxuries of my new internet/cable- less home. This means lots and lots of physical activity and movies (things I have always appreciated).

Valkarie
Seven Pounds
and Benjamin Button - All amazing.

Recently I competed in my first 10k cross country race. I placed 14th of 154. Wayway exceeded my own expectations. I experienced all emotions a viking in battle would have, but in a safer atmosphere, and all in 44.22 minutes.

Mountains and Roots

Check it out! That's my best friend on the kit, Jake. He played a show in Hinton, "the gateway to the Rockies" and the meth capital of Canada.

I bussed out there with an ausie-mate named Brenton. He's a terrorist to the female race.

On big display in the 3rd picture is 'Etobicoke.' So good to see some hometown representation and more importantly some true blood by my side.

My First Day

Ok.. I take it back.
I can't stop now.

After 6 months of freedom and one day of work (today), I realized how bad it stings. Work stings bad. But, I must affirm that living in the mountains is fantastical and outweighs any adverse living conditions such as work or shitty people.

I recently sat down with a Mexican in search of a roommate. She was about my age but oozed 33; career-oriented, clean, subtle, shapely and down to earth - not for me. I couldn't tell you why but I felt as if I were a ginger-bread man in a house of cards, waiting for someone to take a bite of my ginger-bread head. It was awful.

The house was very nice but I wasn't feeling the china or dinette set or the armoire or the stain of the wood floor. At $650/month it wasn't worth my blood, sweat or tears. I have opted to sublet for 3 months under MP5 and hunt a better option.

As for work, today was classroom time. I re-learned the rules i've forgotten with some old guys dressed in what looked like the clothes they received at Christmas. Uneventful like work is, it was.

Fraud

If this trip were a track - it just took a twist.
I now belong to the brotherhood known as CN.

My activity and this blog aren't congruent anymore. I feel as if this has come to an end.

.. but let the adventure roll on

The Grip

Spent the day with JF and Trish at and around the lake (Maligne Lake).
Those old familiar feelings were a' brewin'.

Day ? Jasper

So here I am back in town,
feeling a bit like a stranger without a home.
What's comforting is the familiar faces around each corner.

Scoops, Denji's, pub burgers, Champs, hot tub and Navi Hair Salon - all my old favourites.
Got a sophisticated new hair cut and a job interview in Whistler next week.

Will this be my new home? $1500 apartments sounds about right...

Keep Rolling

We keep looking ahead, looking ahead, looking ahead, forgetting all along about the present.
Clambering up and up, trying to grab hold of something while our years slip silently by.
And until we forget about this notion, we will never be at peace.

- Realize there is no end or death will do this for you.
END.

Day 12 and 13 Golden, BC

Out to Yoho National Park, we arrive in Golden to stay with some free-minded radicals. Olives and marijuana party it was. A day riding Kicking Horse and a friendly BBQ to follow. WE ATE MOOSE (served blue) and it was the most delicious treat I ever did eat. A true representation of "organic," accompanied with the kill story - canoes, sniper scopes and hauling carcass in rubber-maids. Kill your own meat everyone!!! I think this will catch on faster than vegetarianism. Below are some moose steaks and our midnight snack, moose burgers. mmm... also down there is the bed I slept in and some big tires and an old christmas tree we lit on fire.

We had a little sunset fiesta at a secret society locale called the Sunpit. Mostly made up of lifties, the people drank and dug "tiger traps" (holes covered with branches and snow) for the unknowing. Kinda funny but we were not welcome, for we were not locals. bummmerrrr dude..

Probably the most exciting event of the trip.. On our way out of Golden today we stopped road side to take in the view. Spontaniously we hiked one hour up into the back country to take on some fresh pow-pow. A warden came snooping around in probable fear that we were unexperienced mountaineers. In all obviousness we were, but we came out alive in the white out conditions. It was a buzz and refreshingly refreshing danger.

Showcase

Home renovation is a serious passion of mine so I thought it necessary to showcase Lisa and Carlie's house in Canmore. It was way rad and smelled like pine trees. Here's all the Panago Pizza (best value this side of the country) we ate in 2 days and below that are photos through their living room window and deck.

Lisa's got amazing taste in books.
Fresh from the library were titles such as: 660 Curry Recipes and Toronto Murders

Day 8 to 11 Canmore

Hey,
complications have turned our plans over 5 or 6 times but we're back in the mountains and currently in Canmore with Carlie. Her house feels like a 5 star resort complete with slam proof cupboards. The last few days were about body and mind - yoga sessions and meditation and breathing exercises with Puiia. Today we rode Sunshine Village - first of the season. It was somewhere around 17 degrees. Everything was sunshine. Came home and took a long nap. Life is good.

Day 7 Banff/Return to Calgary

Hot springs.
Hitchhiking.
And now
I'm back in Calgary. Dave and Deep flew out this morning. Kevin and I might be here for a few days longer due to a misplaced wallet. Need some time to recover his essentials. Yoga in the meantime.

Day 6 to Banff

Currently in Banff.
Tomorrow brings Carlie and possibly a "Brittany Spears party" at Megan's place in Calgary. Questionable, I know.
Also saw Amy in Lake Louise. Brock all over the map.

Day 5 in Calgary with the Puiia

Day 4 to Calgary

Negligent to what time zone I was in, I woke early on day four.
(Don't believe the maps, Moose Jaw is in fact Mountain time.)
Theoretically, if we kept west at a fast enough pace, we could stay young forever, right?
Like going back in time? I talked to some truckers about this and weather in the lobby.

We finished off Saskatchewan and half of Alberta to Calgary. Hooked up with Basia in the PM, aka Barbara (for you Etobicoke people) and settled into her cozy apartment. More friendly faces made appearances: Mr. Steve Puiia and telecommunications with Lyn Kenney.

It's a big relief getting off the road and settling for some time. After four days of tight spaces I was forgetting my identity. But I'm back now. And human. And have a grocery store within walking distance.

We will spend another night in Calgary, and from there, enter the gates of the greatest place on earth: The Canadian Mother Fuckin' Rockies. yeeaow!

*That home-made-pizza-box-map has been a crucial element to our trip and navigation.*

Days 2 and 3 to Moose Jaw

Ontario is a lot bigger than I thought. It took two days to get out of that beast. Scenic highlights were probably Lake Superior (mostly still frozen) and the Crystal Forest. Stopped in TBay for some gas and 40's, which we consumed in a crack motel (painting hung below). The great plains were exactly what you would imagine - flat. But, I liked em better than northern Ontario. Manitoba and Saskatchewan got undeserved hate. I crushed Saskatchewan today in stick shift (finally). I got the hang of it now. mmmmm listened to a lot of Weezy, aka Lil' Wayne, aka Young Money. Completely down with this guy and I hate to say it... Akon!? Who would have known. R. Kelly got some play in the car too, but he's still a rapist. Right now we're in Moose Jaw and tomorrow will bring Calgary.

I've been dubbed "Nuts and Berries" due to my abstinence towards fast food.

*All current photos taken by Bad Balls*

Toronto to SSM

Mostly Business today with a 7 hour drive. Grey skies and rain.
Grilled asparagus, hummus and black berries.
Sat bitch.
Twitter party.

Friends Without Boarders

Today I'm packing and it aint easy.